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Wanting Something So Badly

What you want defines the distance between you and it/them. There is a process to get there. If you don’t have a process you need to cultivate one. If you have a process trust it. It will embrace you, take you in, and cradle you all the way to its finding.

In the zen tradition there is a saying that if you fall seven hundred times you get up seven hundred and one. The only measure of the distance between where you are and where you want to be is that one extra step.

We know this saying “enjoy the process” but we forget to enjoy and we forget it’s a process. It doesn’t matter what we know if we forgot it. Knowing doesn’t make a difference. But being does.

Knowing then is not an object you wear as a precious jewel or a framed title on your office door, but a breath that travels outside and inside as if the whole world was her private space.

What you know, say it again.

What you’re afraid of saying, say it clearly.

What you judged as irrelevant to your journey forward, place at the centre of your conversation.

What you want so badly is not to be found in a form.

What we want is to say the truth, to touch the things that matter, to express creatively and freely, to give and receive love, to shiver with joy, to be.

What you want dresses in seven hundred different forms and you undress it seven hundred and one times.

This one more time is the only time, it’s the first time, it’s a primal time, it’s the one pulse that brings you to life.


All that I have forgotten

left like a breath

into the ether space.

That’s why I need

to say it one

more time.

Seven hundred times

forgotten, seven hundred

and one refound.

You cannot measure

an untrodden


The distance between

what you want

and yourself


by one

more breath.


Shelly helps people who seek to deepen

self-trust & expression

and want support in getting through

challenging feelings or life questions

with great emotional freedom

Photo by David Hofmann on Unsplash

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